I want to ride like a Tulsa Queen.

I decided that I shall never be the raving beauty or the talented goddess that is Emmylou Harris even though my natural hair is mocking hers as depicted here on this album art. Sigh, I can't compete with that or even with my cool friend that used to swallow swords and eat fire! So, what's a girl to do? Learn how to make blue frosting roses in a cake decorating night class or something?